My whole house is upset :'( My Opa died in the early hours of the night and ever since 8 we've just been cryin non-stop. I don no what to do, i feel so sad. We're going to have to book fligts to Germany and a flat to stay in and the one we want is all booked out and i dont no how oma's gunna cope all on her own in the house in Germany. And i'm goign to miss the Billy Elliot recording session for the funeral which means i cant be in it anymore and this is going to cost us so much money which we dont have to start off with! Nobody i no has ever died before and its a complete shock. Im numb i geuss and dont no what to feel. I wish i would have spent more time with him :( Me and Jonny always went down to the park when mum visited them and oma's gunna be so lonely now in her little vilage. She doesnt have any friends within half and hours drive away and im worried about how we're going to get to Germany in time with al these complications and im upset and stressed and i have loads of hw to do and no spur to do it :'( What should i doo?  

Hey Vicy.

I'm really sorry to hear about your Opa. I completly understand how your feeling at the moment because ive not long gone through it and to be honest im still finding it hard now. What ever i say or do Vicy, I no itsnt going to make you feel any better, but we are all her to support you through it.  Hun, though I no at the moment it seems like the worlds going to end, but it will get better. It wont get better with a click of the fingers or over night. It takes time, it can take weeks, months, years. Its all part of the greiving prosess. When my Grandad, first died, we had no money etc, Couldnt pay for the funeral and things like that. But yu gotta work as a family to pay for you to get to Germany.When someone dies, yes your body goes into so much shock, People say there expecting it and prepared (if the person was suffering with something) but no one is ever prepared. I said i was prepared. But deep deep down i wasnt, It hit me soo hard. Im sure your Oma, will be ok, As long as shes got her family to support her. She needs you the most right now.Have you got the 'What if' questions, where youve said I wish i would ave spent more time with him. Vicy he knows you loved him soo much, And going to the park is kids . Just remember hun, his at peace now and not suffering any more

Take care chick,

We all here for you 

xxxxx

Thanks Paige xxxx Thats what i love about this website - at least 1 person always understands ^_^ Yeh we goin over there on Thursday and comin back Tuesday. I wish we could saty longer and help support Oma because shes all on her own in a village with nobody to support her until we come for a few days! I feel so sorry for her. Yeh. My oma told my mum that just before he dies he told her how proud he was of his two grandchildren and how they meant the world to him (me and my bro). That just made me cry again. I love him so much xx Yeh at least he will never hav to be in this horrible world ever again. Thankyou so much Piage. Hugs xxx

Hey,

Its ok chick, always here for you. . Woow Thursday not long away. Im sure your Oma with be ok chick. At least your with her for 5 days, Its better then nothing. I no she probally not feeling like strong at the moment but deep deep down she is. Awww thats soo nice of your Opa. He is now up there now suffering and looking over you all .  Yeh it brung tears to my eyes jsut readin it hun.  Its ok chick... Hugs xxxxx

I feel so sorry for you, last summmer my gran died and I was devastated, I loved her so much and even now as I talk about her I can feel tears behind my eyes. It really is horrible for you I feel so sorry for you, I couldnt bear it when I happened but all you can do is feel the sadness and get on with it. When people told me this about my gran it made me cry more but your opa is in a better place now, with Jesus and his old family. You and your family need to stick together and support each other (including oma) and remember your happy Opa, not the dead body in the coffin, the Opa who did whatever he did with you. I know this wont make you feel at all happy buit just remember your family are there for you and so are we xx

(btw your school should be understanding if you dont do the homework....if someone dies that is a reason not to do the hw) 

Got back from Germany 1am this morning and yes - i still had to go to school :( Thanks so much for your comments and advice. It's great to have people who understand x Apart from the funeral it was actually a really fun 6 days. It snowed and me and my bro went sledging for the first time in our lives! It was great. And i was able to bottle feed a baby sheep (sooo cute) and hold a one week old goat (also adorable) and my Oma cooked us some of her fantastic meals as well as the fact i was able to spend all day reading at my Oma's house or in the bath :D. Apart from those few moments where you slowdown and your brain rememberes everything all over again - your too busy having fun to feel sad.(my bath is broken back here so it was a blessing ^_^) Being back in England is tough. Being surrounded buy people who don't understand and dont rely care and all the stresses and horrible things in ur life is rely hard. Nd sayin gdby to my Oma was devastating. I dont no how shes gunna cope coz she has no money and she's a mess emotionally. I felt so bad turning my back on her and walking away. Doesnt feel real here tho. Not sure i'm happy to be back. But i've got you guys who always seem to understand so im just bein a little selfish here (pls donty tell me im not coz i am) Posotive point to end: I have my computer back :D x

Heyah Vicy.

Ooo 1am And Went To School, Your Mad Lol. Not Sure How You Did That.  It Ok Chick, Always Here:). Yes The Funeral Is Always The Hardest Bit, But It Does Get Better Promise. Wooow Can I Say Ive Never Ever Been Sledging.. Is It Cool?. Woow Ive Held A Goat :).   Ooo I Loveeee Baths. But I Miss Showers Lol.  It Will Get Better Chick. Okay Im Going To Bed Now Lol So Ill Finsih Reply Tmo

Night xxxx

If it was up to me i woulda been asleep til 11 but nooo mum forced us :@ Yeh sledgine was sooo cool and the hill was rely steep so we went rely fast :D Hope you sleepin better now x Yeh is a bit better now but it's just one more thing added to the pile ya know? And then when little things add to the pile at school i start to feel liek im gunna cry. But at least i managed to stop myself and its probs not gd to cry over everything. I was gunna skip first period but i thought 'u nearly cryin over somet so stupid and little' so i didnt and everythign was okai. Goodnight x

Aww, Sleeeep*face lights up*  

Ooo thats not good, i jsut wouldnt moove from my bed . okays i would of been scared if i went fast lol. Glad you enjoyed it. me and sleep... erm not really...ooo yes vicy i defo no when that happeneds. aww hugs vicy, dont cry chick it will be ok.  crying does help it rreally does. its not stupid chick, every lil thing is important.

xxxx

Crying makes me feel selfish and vunerable. It's like opening up your biggest secrets and emotions for anyone to see and i hate it :( I no it's important to cry but i hate always feeling sad and the only way to let it out is crying and i hate crying... not sure where that leaves me. And in school it's a complete no go area. Nobody understands? Is it any different where you are? Oh hey i've worked out i live quite near to you but cant say anything more cept it's so annoying not beign able to meet up!!! Take Care Paige hun,thx for always listening xxx 

Hey Vicy,

Why does crying make you feel like this though because if you dont open up chick, youll end up exploding everything if someone says something little wrong, and trust me its not nice at all.  I think everyone hates feeling sad and depressed at one point chick, but its nature, lifes full of ups and down. 'Appreciate yourself by allowing yourself the opportunities to grow, develop, and find your true sense of purpose in this life.' Yes I know what you feel like about school not understanding, but thatts there you need to find a teacher you trust, sit them down and explain every thing. I no its hard chick, Ive been there, but thats the first step to success, the way I start to look at it is do you think that all these celberities, footballers, singers and actors etc, got there on there own? Cause they didnt,, they asked for help .

Wooow Close, How Coolio I no, thats the gutting thing .Maybe when we are older? Tbh I dont no hoow it wworks shhh lol..

Its no probs chick, always here to listen to you

Take care too, ... Hugs

xxxxx

I no but i cant help myself. I natuarlly keep it all in. Through my experiences and dad drumming in to me 'never trust anyone' i just can't. Not really. People at school bein stupid again today and arghh thought i was gunna cry again! Yeh i geuss it's about focusing on the ups. I don't know i dont really trust any of my teachers much. They're all too young and inexperienced. They havent been through anything similar and what can they do? I've been given a card saying'vicy is finding it hard to cope. Please let ehr sit outside for 5 minutes' but err what use is that going to do?

Yeh i suppose they did. Meh i dont wanna be famous. hehe :P Yeh definatly we will find eachotherrrr hehe sorry yc people. When i'm 18 nd ur 20 or whatever we will meet!!! :D thx Paige xxx

Hope you sleepin better x

Heyyy,

Yes, I can see where your comming from chick, maybe build trust with one teacher? It will help in the end, and its all confidentual- unless your in danger or someone else is. Yes, my primary school drummed it into my head not to reataliate. So i can defo see your point there. Awww poppet, dont cry *huggles*.. Maybe some of them have, and not shared with anyone?. O.o A time out card? I got one, they really do come in handy, especially if like your really stressed you can just chillax out side for a bit. Hun, are you getting bullied?

Yes we will, some day ... wouldnt it be funny if we already knew each other... Dreams lol... Yes we will tho... Maybe in years to come tho

Me, sleeping better, are you haveing a bubble lol...

xxxxx

Yeh maybe but are school has decided to go to verrticle tutors this next year (in sept) and so i'll ahve a different tutor so i wont rely get a chance to build anything ya know. Yeh i suppose. Well i have got this lady who talk to me about how i am but she really doesnt get it so it's like why tell her. Neva mind hey. Yeh maybe life is trying to brain wash us...? lol. No im not being bullied thankfully but my friends are very insensitive and more immature than most year 8 kids are. It just furstartes me becacuase they say stuff - little things which arent very nice and they all add up and u get the feling their tryna make u feel bad. Urgh and maybe with a normal kid they could shrug it off and laugh but with everything else goign on it's just too much. Sometime i hate school. It's like you cant get away from all that stress anywhere!

Freaky or what hey! Aww thats a shame hun x Have you seen a docter about it? Maybe you should. Oh i forgot you hate doctors! Sorry. lol. Bolleing witrh sea scouts tonight (rely spelt that wrong didnt i. Bolling? Boling? Boleing? Bolleing? I dont no lol) x tc x Wish me luck and that i win lol!!! x

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Heyyy..... Vicy so are weeeeeee with the virticle tutoring, its starts september properly but taster in july,  but find out our tutors in june, i soooo dont wanna swap tutor ive had her for 4years and shes jsut amazing . O.o I agree life is trying to brain wash us, i also agree that life is a test to put us to heaven or hell . Atm the way im going im going to hell. lol. Well im glad use not being bullied.

Yes Freaky lol. Haha, vicy your getting to know me qute well, i wasnt impressed last night as it was really windy and was loud and i ddint sleep until like 2am. So was soooo tired. Wooo break up for schoool tmo..... I think its boliing. Lol I did that with woodcraft, we also made toast- it was rather yummy....

Gooood luck

xxxx